It feels good, doesn’t it?
Deep down, I think we all have this desire to be settled into the life in front of us; not without adventure or change but simply awareness and predictability of whatever that looks like.
April 24, 2013 began stripping Hugh and I of that supposed “comfort” we thought we craved.
The day our twins were born began our journey with HECW2 and all the unknowns it has entailed (go back to the beginning archives to learn more).
At the time, we didn’t know it; but we were well on our way out of the comfort zone and into what I like to call the pruning zone.
“…every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit”.- John 15:2
Since then, we have been in a process of opening our tightly clenched hands- rather, allowing God to open them- as we try to let go of all the things we thought this life would look like in order to grab on to the God who says He knows the exact days of each of our lives; that He wrote it in fact.
“All the days of our lives were written before yet one of them came to be.”- Psalm 139:16
When I began this blog, lovingly titled, “His Hands His Feet His Heart”, I had no idea the things the Lord wanted to do with it. Sometimes, I’m still not sure. Yet God in His wisdom has orchestrated so many things that have both rocked us and left us in awe and worship. He has never left and never forsaken, despite the many days that we feel like the rubble is too deep.
In December of 2018, we brought home our son, James, who has cerebral palsy. At the time, he was seven and had lived in an orphanage for almost all of his life. With our girls, the pruning felt drastic yet gentle. This time it’s felt a bit like being hit with a mac truck.
“Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin…”- Luke 12:27
About a month into our adoption journey, I felt the Lord calling me into a season of rest. I didn’t know what that meant, but I knew I liked the sound of it (however impossible rest with three kids who have special needs felt).
In tangible ways, He also began laying out the description of this space.
Hugh and I decided to plant some wild flowers. I have always loved the idea of this, but I didn’t like the risk involved. Really, the mystery of plants sort of scared me. Breaking it down more, I just didn’t like the idea of not being in control of the results or timing of it all.
Around this same time, my sister had begun the art of bread making and had encouraged me to try the same. Again, I was hesitant for the same reasons. It felt like the leaven and the weather controlled the results, which felt far from restful and therapeutic to me.
Until I began.
Friend, God uses broken things.
It takes broken soil to produce a crop, broken clouds to give rain, broken grain to give bread.
I began to realize that really, flowers and bread have a lot in common: small beginnings. And, not just small beginnings but small beginnings that produce beautiful, hearty, satisfying things.
We just have to take the first step of faith and then, “Be still” and watch God do the rest.
So goes our lives- a lot of seeds and leaven tapestried together to produce something more awe-inspiring than we could possibly imagine- all pointing to the One above it all.
These pages are simply a place to share our personal canvas- not just the flowers and bread but the seeds and leaven of our hearts, too. My prayer is that it would stir up deep conviction in the hearts of those that read that there is a God whose sovereignty and goodness towards us is something we can always rest in. Not only that, but I pray you are able to see the beauty in the breaking.
He (God) is the Bread of Life.
He is our Daily Bread.
He tells us the remarkable story of our lives- the one that promises us that in Jesus, imperishable seed is the stuff we are made of.
Forever is coming and it starts today.
Anything I write or speak is my feeble attempt to share how He is teaching me to live out and live through and live in this very thing- not in spite of our circumstances but in the middle of them. My prayer is that it would stir a desire in your heart to look for God in all seasons of your life, in each and every detail. I pray you- yes, you- would find freedom and true joy in believing in the saving power found only in Jesus Christ, the Son of God; and that this truth would spill out like an ever-flowing spring.
All is grace.
To get in touch with Morgan about speaking at a future bible study, women’s event, or conference, please message her on the Seeds and Leaven Instagram page, or, email Morgan at firstname.lastname@example.org .