Needy.

Needy. The word has such a negative connotation in the society we live in. As a woman, it seems as if we are told, at a young age, to never “need” a man. We are encouraged to not seem to “needy” toward those around us. It’s unattractive, they say. Dangerous, even. Independence is what we are preached; and there is pride associated in being an “independent woman” who, “takes care of herself” or, “doesn’t need anyone”. Needy.

This is certainly not going to be a blog about the roles of a woman, nor will I attempt to give a theological lesson on God’s thoughts on submission. I do believe that we were created equal but different as man and woman, and I am convinced that each of us is most content when we are comfortable in those roles. However, I want to talk about this concept of “neediness”, because I do believe that it sets a foundation for our relationship with the Lord and how we approach Him.

“He sent from on high, He took me; He drew me out of many waters. He rescued me from my strong enemy and from those who hated me, for they were too mighty for me. They confronted me in the day of my calamity, but the Lord was my support. He brought me out into a broad place; He rescued me because He delighted in me.”- Psalm 18:16-19

Our salvation. I believe that, at the very core of who we are, we are needy. We hunger, we thirst, we work, we desire…we have needs. I am not talking about those things we think we need but are not necessarily vital. At the center of who we are, we have true, actual needs. No matter what we believe, we have this in common. And, each of us has the desire for eternity in our hearts. At the end of the day, we all know we were meant for more than this world offers. Our life is but a breath, and I don’t think any of us feels like we were meant for just a breath. We have a Savior who met this central need for us at the cross, and as we read through His word, it is pretty clear that He was not only most aware of our neediness; He was also the only one able to meet us in it. You see, that’s the beautiful thing about the Lord. We are encouraged to not be too needy with those around us because of fear. Fears of being “too much”. Fears of not having those needs met. Fears of being too vulnerable. Fears that if people saw who we really were, they would leave. Fears that we would seem helpless. But God. God saw us, from the beginning, in our helplessness. In our vast neediness. In our naked state. And, not only did He not say, “This is too much for me to handle; I’m out”; He took it all upon Himself at the cross and said, “My child, you are full of great need, yet your greatest need is spiritual. There is no one that is able to help you with those needs but me. I commit to helping you with all your needs. I commit to giving you my spirit to replace your weak, failing spirit in order to have the ability to make you whole. I commit to you if yet you would admit your neediness to me”. You see? The basis of our faith as a Christian is admitting our neediness knowing that God Himself can handle it. The beauty of it all is that instead of leaving us weaker; He is able to make us stronger in our weakness- because of who He is, not because of who we are. Once we recognize the state we are in without Him, and allow God to fill us up, we no longer have to fear being “needy” because at all times, we know He is meeting us and providing for the things that matter. And, instead of walking around with a cup, each day begging others to fill it up, we can start every morning, every moment, with our cup already full; and we can allow what He has given us to pour out to others around us. We are safe with Him.

“But God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”- Romans 5:8

He died for us in the midst of our humanity. This God, this God who is able to take our bloody stains and make them white as snow by shedding His blood for us, He has already met our greatest need and promises to continue to meet us where we are at if yet we would have the faith to believe. And, He sends us others, just like us in our brokenness and messiness, and gives them the opportunity to pour out His love onto us. Learning to accept this love, to allow others to meet you exactly where you are without any fear, isn’t easy. But, because of Christ, we don’t have to be afraid because our Hope, our plans, our core needs, are met in Him.

As we head to this appointment, I am needy. I am desperate for God to show up; I am longing for Him to do what seems like a miracle. His children, our brothers and sisters, have poured out from their cups His money, His love, His words…all His. They are fervently seeking Him on our behalf, and gratitude doesn’t even quite cover how this makes us feel. We are so grateful that He has loved us through His people in this; and are humbled knowing they will continue to be with us in this journey. He is the mighty One; and as we pray for answers at this appointment, I know that I do not have to defend Him if in fact He withholds those. His choices are always best. We come to the throne, confident of who He is in all His goodness, and confident that we can approach Him without fear. Friends, we can pray for a diagnosis over and over and over again. We can ask thousands to do the same. But, ultimately, His plans will stand. And, there is so much goodness in that because I do not want anything unless it has been filtered through His loving hands.

So, this morning. In a little while, we will head toward the airport with two beautiful, fearfully and wonderfully made, little girls. We will travel to those who are ultimately just men, and tomorrow, we will pray that God will give them the wisdom and discernment to understand our girls more. We will not fear, for we know that at the end of the day, He knows. He knows them through and through. He created them in my womb; and the plans for their lives are His. Friends, there is such beauty in that fact that we can be needy before this God, this God who created and loved us to hell and back. He will sustain you today, no matter what today holds. You can come to Him and rest in who He is. Admit your dependence on Him today and cling to His promises. He is worthy.